I will never forget going to my first parent-teacher conference as a parent instead of the teacher. I was so nervous. My husband and I have collectively led many conferences as the teacher but sitting on the other side of the table getting ready to hear about my own kid was unnerving.  

In small plastic chairs, we sat down and looked at the report card and went through the numbers 2, 3, 3, 2, 4… multiple worksheets were on hand to provide evidence and validation of the standard and the ranking on the report card. 

I left the conference knowing that Abby had a range of 2s and 3s and 4s on a variety of standards based on a variety of tests and assignments but still wondering, so how is she REALLY doing? What I really wanted to know at the parent-teacher conference had little to do with the percentage of spelling words that she got correct or how many math problems she can answer correctly in a minute, or if she accurately copied the words from the board. As a mom, and as an educator, here is what I wanted at the first conference and still really want to know from my child’s teacher at our conference. 

What is going well? 

No matter who you are, starting off with celebrations, strengths, highlights-call them whatever you want- but please start with what is going well. It is a vulnerable position getting feedback about yourself, let alone your child, and starting with a positive is helpful. I want to know that you see my child and who they are. If I feel like you value them and see who they are and the assets they bring I will be much more willing to hear the challenges that exist (because they always exist). 

How does my child engage with others? 

I see my child at home and in settings that I typically have more control over and see how my child interacts and reacts but I have little visibility in school and only know the snippets that I hear from them when they get home. I want to know what they are like in school. Are they happy in school? Do they have friends? Do they get along well with others? Are they kind, respectful, courageous?  Do they include others, help others? Are there any red flags that I should be aware of? 

Are they showing growth academically? 

It tells me very little if they got a 72% on a chapter 2 test. I really want to know how they are growing in the knowledge, skills, and dispositions that are critical for them to develop as a competent human. For example, the ability to read and write and communicate their ideas. Can they find information that is relevant to solve meaningful problems? Do you see progress from your first days with them? What are the goals that you are working towards and how is my child doing? Are they where you would expect them to be? Why or why not?

I really like how this breakdown that my colleague Devin Vodicka shared in his article What Might a learner-centered report card look like? and would be thrilled to have this information about my child.

How can we support? 

It can feel isolating as a teacher and too many times we feel unsupported or even at odds with families. This often comes at the cost of miscommunication and assumptions of what each expects of other. If we are clear on what we want the kids to accomplish and where they are in the process, we can all work better together. Overall, I want to know how we can work together and what we can do to best support our child’s journey. What challenges do you see that we should be aware of? Are there issues that we need to understand and address? How can we reinforce and practice what you are working on in school? What might be the next steps? 

Putting Learners at the Center

For many years, I would go to school twice a year for conferences and my kids were never involved in this conference at all. They did the work, the teacher graded it, recorded it and shared it with us at the conference and then I would go home from the conference and share what I understood from their teacher or ask questions and they would give some vague answer. It was like a game of telephone where the message gets muffled and jumbled and by the time it gets to the end, it barely resembles the initial intention of the message. Although they may have received a grade, I never really understood where they were in relationship to their goals, the learning outcomes, or their peers and I doubt they did either. 

Last week this changed. Abby not only came with us to her conference, she led it. Matt and I sat with her and her teacher at a table and she welcomed us all to her conference. 

She shared what she is working on in Language arts such as weekly book club discussions, writing personal narratives, creating an expanded metaphor, examining the author’s perspective and messages, etc. She then provided a few pieces of evidence of her work and an area that she has shown growth. She did the same for math, science, art, and PE. One of my favorite comments from her was, “One thing I bring to our classroom community is friendship. I feel that I am a good friend and I include everyone. She also noted that although she gets her work done she can be easily distracted by all of those friends she has:).”  

Abby spoke for almost 90% of the time, we asked a few questions and her teacher shared her perspective and the report card that provided further detail on the areas that Abby covered in the conference. We discussed some data regarding her performance in relation to her grade-level peers and she shared a few examples about Abby including how thoughtful and creative she is. I also learned that she made this creation out of paper bags for a class decoration.  

Abby’s conference reminded me that although what I hear at the conference is important, what really matters to me is who I hear it from. Listening to Abby share what she is proud of, what’s going well, her evidence of growth and goals to improve was powerful and you could see the ownership and preparation had created more purpose and motivated her to own her next steps.

Authentic learning is often at odds with the expectations placed on many teachers to cover, assess, and document achievement based on our existing system.  Instead, when we involve learners and coach them to set goals and track their growth, we allow them to truly own the learning process and empower them to navigate the next steps.

I am currently working with a few different districts on rethinking their progress reports and processes. I would love to hear other ideas and examples of how you are engaging learners in the process and helping to learners to navigate their learning journey.